Scratching the surface, you will find I am not a snob, or stuck-up and quietly condescending, like you may think. I am curious and watching. Listening and absorbing. Waiting and reacting.
Dig a little deeper and you will hear about all the ways the things you say are affecting me. The triggers know no bounds are are frequently dredging up old stuff from the past; things I keep thinking will just fall away, and I know it’s time to accept that they will likely keep testing me; it’s my reactions that can change. it’s the jealousy, abandonment, rejection, wanting to be liked, not feeling good enough, feeling like I’m too much, insecurity and lack of trust and safety, that you’ll find.
Shovel a bit more and you’ll see that I’m just like you. And we are the same. I am you, and you are me. I know your stories and you will know mine, or you knew them years ago. I want to be seen by you and to witness your beauty and love.
Take me all apart and there is the spark of light that longs to go back to where it came from. It watches all this, and waits.