Some days it can be very easy for me to depend on my partner to make me happy. I went on a journey today…
…from doing something that made me happy (this involved working on a project that I have been putting off for a long time)…
…to sharing it with my partner…
…to feeling ignored/unheard/unimportant (one leads to another, down a spiral…) when he didn’t respond…
…to choosing to move through that feeling (by painting and simply feeling ignored, and remembering where that trigger comes from)…
…to noticing how my expectations (hoping that he will respond and comment in a positive way)…
…to realizing I am in charge of how I feel.
Today’s Lessons!
I am responsible for how I feel.
Any feelings that come up are totally ok, and worth feeling.
Working on projects (rather than procrastinating), and being busy doing things I love, helps me to feel good about myself.
Having expectations around another person’s behavior can lead to disappointment, or trigger other emotions.
I know myself well enough now to see that when I am triggered by unmet expectations, I am better off managing these myself than turning to the person who triggered it in the first place (I don’t want to look to them to “fix” it). This is a tricky one, though, because sometimes I push that to the limit, thinking I have to work things out alone. It’s totally ok to reach out to someone who is not involved in order to feel heard.
Thanks for reading.
xo
The painting is available HERE.