Sometimes I feel like this self love journey hasn’t helped me one bit. I still struggle, at times, to accept my imperfect body, my inability to always get things done right the first time, and to accept that I am actually loveable and likeable exactly as I am. Often, I find I am more willing to accept my disbelief that I am loveable, my disbelief that I am wanted and desired by my lover, my disbelief that I am perfect as I am: perfectly imperfect.
Why is it so hard for me to move past this disbelief? Because I’ve believed otherwise for 43 years, and my stories have kept me safe from being hurt by others. Why can’t I just let go of the disbelief once and for all? Because I fear that if I say I’m letting go of it, and then it comes back, I will believe I have failed.
Am I willing to suspend my disbelief long enough to allow myself to feel loved by others?
Will I accept that others speak truthfully to me?
Will I accept that I am worthy of love?
Will I accept that I am imperfect?
Will I accept me, as I am, right now?